How to Overcome Victim Mentality?

As shared in the previous post about the solar plexus, we know that people with hurt solar plexus tend to have a victim mentality, not taking responsibility for their issues in life, feeling hopeless and powerless no matter what they do. we can fix it by healing the solar plexus and mastering this mentality on the energetic level. Let’s dive into how to overcome victim mentality to the root of it.

victim mentality

What You Need to Understand about All Your Life Problems

Whatever is left unresolved and stuck within our energy field will continue to manifest in the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual aspects of our lives until we heal it. There is no way to escape. We need to recognize it, face it, feel it, and heal it, not anyone else.

Einstein said, “Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics.”. Therefore, if you can’t transform the negative energy that is still trapped inside you, it will keep manifesting in your life in various ways, to different extents to the point where you can’t ignore it anymore. 

So, all challenges you have, whether it is a tricky person, or a difficult situation at work, or a toxic relationship, all come down to you and your inner shadow that needs to be worked on. Keep that in mind. And take the challenges as opportunities to realize what is remaining inside to be dealt with. You need to let go of the victim mentality. Otherwise, those unlearnt lessons will keep coming back into your life. 

How to Overcome Victim Mentality in the Energetic Level

1. Remember that you are always loved unconditionally

If you are unable to realize or learn the lesson you’ve chosen, you still deserve to be loved. You come to life not to receive punishment for not completing your lessons. In fact, you come to experience all types and levels of emotions, to be fully supported to graduate from soul level lessons, to learn to love yourself and all things without any judgment or conditions. In the end, you can get rid of the dualistic matrix (good or bad, right or wrong) and enjoy this beautiful life to the fullest!

2. Be aware and actively remove any thoughts that are under the victim mentality

Most of us are programmed that bad things that happen to us are caused by external factors, and our emotions depend on the feelings/behaviors/attitudes of others. It is only when we have the courage to realize that we are the only ones responsible for our emotions that we can break out of the loop of losing ourselves, putting ourselves under the shadow of the external world. 

When the ‘bad’ thing comes to us, don’t rush to bring on the victim mindset “Why me?”, “I got it because of this… or that…”. Instead, love yourself first. Then try to understand what lesson it tries to teach us, and why it is necessary for us to realize the lesson (did we ignore previous lessons or not?), what we need to do to complete this lesson, and so on. Only we can answer these questions ourselves, through intuition, through meditation to connect with the subconscious mind and the inner voice, not drowning in fear, anger, resentment.

3. You are NOT a victim, you are the CREATOR.

You have complete control over your life and all your experiences. More precisely you have the power to create every experience you have in each moment! 

And if you still experience ”bad” things in your life, do not feel discouraged! All of the soul beings here are still learning in this Earth School, so are you. The good thing is when you are aware and take responsibility instead of complaining and blaming, thereby planning to change, then you are no longer a victim. Now you, with the attitude of being the creator (the true nature of all of us), have begun to walk on the foundation of higher vibrations – courage, acceptance, love, joy, peace. As the result,  you are able to shift or transmute what happens around you that you don’t see fit anymore.

you are the creator of your life, not a victim

For example, you don’t like your job because your boss is constantly scolding you. Every time the boss yells, the victim mindset will say to itself: “Again! Always! I hate this job because my boss always does this to me! Why am I like this? Why doesn’t Simone get it but I get it? It’s not fair! I can’t take it anymore!…”. That way, you are preventing yourself from being a creator.

What a CREATOR would do…

It does not mean that you need to quit your job right away when circumstances do not allow it. What you need to do as a creator is to take responsibility for the reality that you have, for the emotions that arise within you. In that angry-boss reality, you choose how you react to it, how you see it, and how you feel about it: “I know I don’t like this job. I know why I still choose to do this job because I need the money (or I haven’t found another job, or this job fits me, etc.). I know I’ll be in my boss’ room later and he or she will yell again, but it’s okay, I know I’m the one who chose to stay with this job, I’m the one who chooses how I respond to my boss…”.

At that time, you are responsible for what you do, you realize that you are the creator of your life.

Another example, your spouse is always venting unpleasant things at work on you, and at times like these, the victim’s mind will see: “She upsets me all day” or “Again, he’s always complaining, so tired/bored!” or “I really want to run away from home!”. It is true that you are not happy with the fact that your husband/wife often complains and takes out their anger on you, but is it their fault that you are unhappy? No, it is not! It is you who choose each experience and emotion that you have!

What a CREATOR would do…

You are the one who chooses to stay in this relationship, you are the one who chooses how you feel in the face of these things. Indeed, you can choose to empathize more with your spouse. Or you can choose to leave the room if you really don’t want to listen. Another option is that you choose to be an observer who doesn’t get carried away with the other person’s feelings. Or you can choose a higher view and know that their discomfort is coming from the job and not directed at you.

Always believe that you are loved and deserve all the good that you desire. It is with that starting point that you no longer look at yourself as a victim. You know it’s all your choice, it’s all yours to make, and you can create the best you think you deserve!

From now on, practice consciously letting go of the victim mindset, in every situation that occurs during the day. If you find yourself blaming someone else, it is okay, at least you could recognize that! Congratulations! When you find out that you start blaming, stop, and first of all, simply give yourself some love and understanding. Then, take responsibility for your own experience, and consciously choose how you want to respond!

Tell me what you think about victim mentality! Have you had any experiences with this type of mindset, or want to add any other suggestions or questions? I would love to hear that, please leave a comment below.

Much love,
W. / E.

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8 People reacted on this

  1. I think your article is a very important read, because like so many others I tend to take things too personally, and now that I know that I might be able to internally control these negative fealings.

    I think things will work out better emotionally, and financially.

    Does this system of self-control, help you out financuly?

    Anyway, looking forward to giving it a try do I need to know anything else, like any prosses.

    Thank You,

    Bill Wright   


    1. Hi Bill,

      Thanks for your question! This victim mentality can bring you down on every aspect of your life because it keeps you from taking responsibility and doing anything to solve your problems in life, including financial struggles. When you find your way out of considering yourself as a passive victim, you will realize that money issues also reflect some limiting beliefs within yourself around abundance and self-worth. When you know that you deserve all the good things in life and money is also energy to circulate around and not limited to any one, you will enjoy the abundance of life yourself! 

  2. This is very helpful information about overcoming the victim mentality. There are so many people I know that believe they are a victim of letdowns in life and just stay with being a victim. These people that don’t work on their mentality think everything is owed to them or stay in depression. I am going to share your article with the ones that I know will benefit from this great read. 

    1. Hi Jannette

      Thanks for your comment! Victim mentality is deeply programmed in most of us at different levels, even myself. So we all need to be aware of our thoughts and emotions which will manifest into our realities.

      Thanks for sharing my post too! I really appreciate that!



  3. Hi Grace! Thank you so much for this post that is just oozing with self-compassion- I love it! It is very important to see that there are actually a lot of ways that people can actively overcome the victim mentality. I think this could be helpful for some of my patients to read who may be going through a difficult time during COVID-19. 

    1. Hi Erica,

      Thanks for your comment! This is really difficult time for many of us so please share if you think my post can benefit them. 

      All the best,


  4. I must say tank you for this– I am not a victim but a creator. This is where a lot if us fail we accept the challenges as an issue and we never deal with it. But the creator mentality is different. I must stand up with the creator mentality and face my challenges. I must make life different and cause a change from them 

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